A few months ago I was talking with a friend about the power of crystals and she told me about a stone called Moldavite. It is known as a stone of "spiritual awakening and inner transformation. Meditating with Moldavite can open one up to higher states of consciousness and connect you more profoundly with your highest purpose. Moldavite can deepen and intensify meditation."
I thought wonderful!! I want to have a spiritual awaking and find my highest purpose so I got myself a moldavite stone pendant for my birthday and was excited to see what was in store for me with my new lifes purpose coming my way. I have been on a unsure and chaotic journey for many years now and need some direction and security. I don't feel like I am good at a single thing except maybe making the wrong choices. I have quit jobs I wish I hadn't and let anxiety keep me from finding my passion.
I started wearing the pendant and soon after my friend asked me if I had any shake ups happening? I said I wasn't sure but knew I hadn't. I thought ok, I guess it either means I'm on the right path for my higher purpose in which case I guess my path must be to have difficulties in this life and I needed to figure out quickly what lesson I was supposed to be learning or the next 30 years were going to be as difficult as the last 30. Little did I know the shake up was about to happen. They just when you think things can't get any worse they do.
Financial struggle has been a part of my life for the past 20 years. When I got married I had a great job. I worked in television production which had been a lifelong dream of mine. I was in the Directors Guild of America which to me was incredible to be part of the same club as the most accomplished directors I admired. Unfortunatly that job seemed to be a dead end, promotions were given to others when I had seniorty and experience while I was on maternity leave. I eventually gave up on that career path and when my kids were only 8, 5 & 6 months old I was diagnosed with invasive breast cancer. Needless to say my career dreams were shattered and the fight began.
As to not get off on a tangent I'll get back on topic of the life changing shake up. Shortly after telling my friend I wasn't sure if I had seen any effects of the moldavite stone, I was waiting to pick my middle daughter up from school when my husband said he needed to facetime me for a minute. I thought he must have some wonderful news if he wanted to tell me over facetime because he obviously wanted to see my reaction. Finally, I thought, some financial relief must be coming our way. Instead the news was that our landlord was going to be selling our condo we had been renting for the past 7 years. We were going to have to move in a time where rents were double what we have been paying, no acting work was coming my husbands way and I had not been able to find a new job in 5 years of looking. Being stuck at a job that was supposed to just be a part time temporary job has been difficult. I was thankful to have a job during covid and during the acting strike but it is not a job with any benifits or growth opportunity. They only allow me 24 hours a week of paid work. Of course I am welcome to volunteer as much as Iike eventhough other staff members get paid or credit for every minute they are on campus, I am the only one that is made to feel that if I expect to get paid for more than 24 hours that I must be only interested in the $ not the community service. Something I have been told I specifically need to give up, being made to feel like.
That is it for today. Join me again as I navigate the "excitement" coming my way and see if this beautiful stone is a blessing or my own personal kryptonite.
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